Do you wish you had more time? Most of us do. Time is one of life’s most precious commodities. As a matter of fact, I once heard time referred to as the “currency of life.” Yet so often we treat time as if it were disposable.
One of the reasons time is so precious is that it is ticking away. You have less time on this earth today than you did yesterday. That’s not meant to be morbid. It’s meant to be real.
I’ve done a lot of research on time management and have tried pretty much every time management strategy out there. I’ve even taught a course on the subject. But it’s still a constant challenge that requires me to remain mindful and vigilant every day. With all the distractions in our society, it’s way too easy to lose focus and to find time wasting away. I’m guessing you can relate.
There are tons of tips I could offer you on time management. But for now, I’m going to suggest three areas you can begin to address immediately to help you not just manage – but truly cherish – your time.
Challenge Your Procrastination
The roots of procrastination are tangled up in a whole lot of psychological stuff that leads to limiting beliefs and negative self-talk. If you’re a classic procrastinator, we probably need some time together to untangle all that stuff. But for now, just realize that to some degree we are all a product of our self-talk, and some of that self-talk can be fertile ground for procrastination.
In the area of time management, or “time fulfillment” as I like to call it, one of the most powerful changes you can make is to change your self-talk from “I have to” to “I choose to.”
The “I have to” and “I should” messages tell your brain that you are being forced to do something against your will. As Neil Fiore, Ph.D., explains in his book The Now Habit, these messages create feelings of victimhood – and leave us feeling powerless over our time.
Fiore further explains that your energy can’t go in two directions at once. While you subconsciously use your mental energy to brace yourself against the work you “have to” do while trying to muster up the energy to start the task, you become immobilized.
So, what do we do? We mindlessly check our social media feed…or look for deals on Amazon Prime…or raid the pantry…or look out the window to see if it’s raining. Anything to get away from the relatively simple task that has now grown into the most scary situation to be avoided at all costs. It’s actually a little ridiculous, isn’t it?
All the while, this procrastination causes us inner turmoil. Because deep down, we know we will not be able to rest until the task is complete.
The good news is that getting unstuck on the task could be as simple as changing your inner dialogue. Give it a try. Next time you’re putting a task off, switch your self-talk from “I have to” or “I should” to “I choose to.” Because when it comes down to it, you do have a choice. You choose to work to earn money. You choose to run to the store so you can make a delicious dinner. You choose to wear clean clothes.
You don’t have to love the task in front of you, but you can choose to:
- recognize its importance
- value it enough that you want to give it your best
- appreciate the benefits it provides
- avoid the consequences of not doing it
- free your mind from the weight of leaving this task undone
- enjoy the pleasure of doing your best
Maybe your self-talk could go something like this:
- I choose to do this for my family.
- I choose to give my best to my company in exchange for my salary.
- I will do this because I want to set a good example.
- I will start now so I can relax with a clear mind this evening.
- I choose to do this because it’s the right thing to do.
- I get to perform this interesting work. I am so grateful.
When you find yourself struggling to get started, make a decision to embrace the task. You’ve heard of “Fake it till you make it,” right? It applies here.
Remember – you send hundreds, if not thousands, of messages to your mind every day that either reinforce existing beliefs or challenge old ones. Make sure you’re sending the right messages.
Work Hard Towards Guilt-Free Down Time
“One of the most devastating consequences of procrastination is that it leads to putting off living.” ~ Neil Fiore, Ph.D., The Now Habit
Leisure time is extremely important, but (big BUT): it must be guilt-free to be rewarding. Otherwise, it’s stolen time, and it just adds to the stress we already feel. Because otherwise, not only did we NOT do Task A, but we stole time, the most precious commodity, on top of it. Yikes.
It’s important that we elevate the importance of guilt-free leisure time and make it our goal. How can we do this? Start by replacing “I don’t have time to play” with “I choose to work hard and will then play hard.”
We’ve all experienced times when we were so burned out that we weren’t any good to anyone – ourselves included. We made mistakes, were short with others, and just weren’t ourselves. Down time can help prevent this. Work towards it.
Here are some mind tricks to change your way of thinking so that guilt-free down time becomes the ultimate prize at the end of a job well done:
- Replace “This project is so big. I’ll never finish!” with “I can take one small step. Then I’ll be closer to the goal and my free time.”
- Replace “I must be perfect” with “I’ll do my best. If I make a mistake, it’s not the end of the world. I’ll fix it and learn from it.”
- Replace “I can’t relax until this is done” with “I’ll make progress, then I’ll take a quick break to reset.”
Planned breaks help us keep our energy levels high. Set a timer and take a five-or ten-minute break after you have worked hard for one hour. Or write the first three paragraphs of a report, then take a coffee break. Research four articles, then go on a five-minute walk.
Knowing you have something to look forward to in the near future reduces the dread of the task before you. And, here’s a bonus: you may find that while you’re taking a break, your subconscious mind is providing clear, almost effortless solutions to the big scary task that previously seemed insurmountable.
Manage your Emotions and Mental Energy
We’re all human and our emotions follow us wherever we go. There are thoughts that pop into our heads throughout the day that can completely distract us from the task in front of us.
Below are some tips on managing your emotions and mental energy so they don’t throw you off schedule.
“To-do” reminders
It can be all too tempting to get into the habit of responding to the minutiae of daily life. You realize you need a gallon of milk, or have a bill to pay, or need to change the lightbulb on the front porch. Suddenly this “urgent” task distracts you from the task at hand. So what can you do?
Write it down to relieve yourself of the mental burden of having to remember. Keep a notepad by your desk, or use one of the many phone apps created for this purpose. The point is to write it down and deal with it later.
Perhaps you could take a break to pay the bill after 30 minutes of productive work. This turns the “to-do” into a reward for completing work instead of a reason to procrastinate. Clear your mind of the mounting list of “to-dos” by writing them down.
Random thoughts
These do not necessarily require immediate follow-up, but can distract us from the task at hand.
Maybe you suddenly think, “It’s Aunt Judy’s birthday next month” or “It sure would be fun to go to Disney World next summer (if we can travel freely by then).” When these thoughts arrive, either let them fly on by, or jot them down. Just don’t abandon your report that is due at 5 PM to start surfing the web for the best Magic Kingdom dining deals.
Strong emotions
Occasionally, life overwhelms us and strong emotions take over, making it difficult to focus on just about anything. Obviously, we need time to deal with life’s heavier issues. But there are times when we don’t have the luxury to take time off.
It’s important to deal with strong emotions, even if for five minutes. Think through the emotions and process them. Identify what is troubling you the most, and jot down some positive encouragements or ways you could cope with the situation or seek support when time allows.
You could also tell yourself you will work hard for a set amount of time, then take a break to think your situation through some more. The important thing is to manage your emotions so your emotions don’t manage you…and your time.
Become an Expert Time-Fulfiller
When it comes down to it, the ability to manage your time effectively is right in your mind. By changing your self-talk, working hard towards guilt-free down time, and managing your thoughts and emotions, you can switch your energy from that of an overwhelmed procrastinator to that of a motivated producer.
As you do this, you will find that your time multiplies. And that leads to more guilt-free down time doing what you truly love, with those you love. Now that’s fulfilling.
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